Start Small, Go Far

A single story can bring family history to life

Dear Readers,

Life is big; family history is big, and thus we tend to think of any writing based on family history as a big project—a book project. However, writing a book is a daunting task. Therefore, quite often, capturing stories from family history is never attempted, even though we all have stories to tell.

There is, however, another way:

Start small.

Focus on learning how to write one short family story.

A memoir does not have to be a book.

Regarding shorter pieces, I am often asked:

What’s the difference between a personal essay and a memoir?

While a personal essay might bring in some memories, it is a story of the present, in which you relate an insight, a realization, an epiphany. A memoir, on the other hand, is a story of the past, even if it is the recent past. It can be short, but it relies on memory and aims to find the meaning of that memory. That’s the difference.

You are more likely to find success by going small, by distilling one particular event into a short memoir.

Start with whatever story you find most interesting.

Having taught memoir writing for more than ten years, I know that crafting a story from real life is best learned by focusing on one event.

Thankfully, one well-crafted scene can capture more of the mosaic of life than 25 pages of exposition.

Furthermore, by going small, you avoid the structural challenges of a larger work.

Completing this one story will not only give you the satisfaction of actually “having done something with” a family story, it will also teach you a lot about how to tell and write this kind of story.

If you’re so inclined, try to get it published. The chances of having a short piece published are much higher. There are so many online publications and Substacks out there these days, you might just be able to find one that is interested in your topic. Or better yet, start your own Substack and publish your stories there, easily shared with your family, friends and others who might be interested.

A completed story also gives you something to work with.

It sets you on your path. Write another one, then another. Soon you might find that they congregate around a certain topic, and you could create a story collection, or a memoir of linked essays. And pretty soon, you’ll have written a bunch of stories, bringing your family history to life!

I have found, for example, that the project of writing about my father’s sudden death that I began almost a year ago with my siblings has, in the meantime, yielded a collection of “Dad stories.” And it has slowly dawned on me that I might actually have produced the draft of my next book, without setting out to do so.

But, again, you don’t have to write a book. Collecting a few anecdotes about a person (like I did with my Little Klaus post) suffices, because, as I like to reiterate:

Something is better than nothing.

And you know what? After I published that post, my brother ran with it and created a booklet about our uncle, who died so young, featuring the stories I had written and a collection of beautiful black and white photos we have of our uncle.

One small story can lead to so many more things!

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This post is a slightly altered excerpt from my guide How to Write Compelling Stories from Family History: